looking for that light at the end of the tunnel...

it's hard to be optimistic sometimes. with so many things hanging over my head like dad's court case, school, money, assignments, exams, the recent email debacle in class and questions that just keep surfacing in my head, it's hard to actually look on the brighter side of life and see the good that's come out of it. guess it's just one of those days where i just can't find a way to perk myself up, especially with this endless, craptastic rainy patch going on. everything just looks so glum, a situation definitely not assisted by the dark, brooding grey clouds that populate the sky these days that only serves to accentuate this darkness creeping over and into me like a poison spreading through a body. i am hurting on the inside. i am doubtful. i am frustrated and furious.

only God and time have the answers i seek. answers that i so desperately need, so longingly want. i suppose i am due this test of my resolve, for before this episode, life had been going on so nicely and smoothly. only through stepping out can one expand his comfort zone and grow. but it is a treacherous and most difficult step indeed... i only pray that i am strong enough to weather the storm.