that sinking feeling...

well... i guess i don't have much to say about this disaster that's gonna be my FE1007 maths 2 paper that's gonna occur in 7 and a half hours time. or maybe i do. but even with this whole crazy fracas of dad's case going on in the background, i guess i'm the source of my own undoing... not putting in sufficient effort throughout the semester, not attending lectures, not starting revision earlier... i think i thoroughly deserve a good rollicking from anyone who knows just how little effort i put into this paper. the dark side of me really wonders why people bother to wish me good luck and that with the kinda effort that's gone into the preparation for this paper, i hardly deserve even the slightest shred of pity or goodwill...

damn my dark side. words cannot express the gratitude i felt for all the well wishes i received. especially for all you wonderful ppl who checked up on dad... it really did my soul plenty of good and warmed my heart. i don't know how i'm gonna get through the paper, or even hope to live up to the good lucks and all the bests, but i will battle with what little knowledge i have every step of the way. i will not despair, and i will not succumb to this sickening feeling in the core of my being. i will face the music with honour, even if it means staring failure straight in the face. and when i receive my just desserts, i will gracefully accept them and move on, be it to leave this whole thing behind or face this adversary once again. once again my friends, thank you and God bless you all. you all really know how to make a silly, foolish boy like me feel like the most blessed person on the face of this planet...